Especially if you dont even know me that well yet .
<4 months of friendship .
"i love my friends and i wouldnt screw them over"
( What makes you think i dont love my friends and will screw them over , you included ? )
"i love them irregardless of how they look or what they are and where they are from"
( Well like i said , <4 months of friendship please dont assume im not like that . )
"i treasure my friendships alot"
( If i dont will i still be unable to sleep at night just cos you 're not talking to me , sending you so many smses even when you only replied one ? )
"and if you think im not good enough for you
then, its alright. cause i dont need you either"
( It 's not about who needing whom , why the hell would you think i think you 're not good enough for me - THINK : WICKED RUMORS )
"if you could just admit what you did say
or even what you felt and thought in your mind
even if it was just for a moment
could you cross your heart and say you didnt feel that way?"
( Oh how i wish i can just admit what i said to something that i didnt and make you feel better and all , but sorry im selfish im not gonna betray myself just to salvage this friendship )
"i dont know what to believe
but i believe you said such things.
maybe that already defeats the purpose of a friendship"
( Glad that you know . Stares at this whole chunk of words , should i be the one feeling hurt and disappointed when you chose a rumor over me ? )
"i wanted to believe you, i wanted time to think through it all
but all i know is that i couldnt bring myself to trust that you didnt"
( Why ? Maybe because deep down right from the start you didnt want to like me / believe in me . Idk . )
"im not perfect, but i treat my friends as equals
well, thats where we are different"
( Seriously , stop judging . )
"it hurt my pride
i dont feel bad about the way i look
because looks arent everything
at the end of the day, how you look inside is more impt"
( What makes you think all these isnt hurting mine ? I dont need you to start lecturing me about how it's-the-inside-that-counts thingys because that 's what i believe in ever since young back to the point , you dont even know me well enough )
"if you really said it and if looks, status, pettiness about who better than who and pointless comparison is so important to you, dont drag me in."
( Where 's the if-you-really-didnt-say-it antithesis ? You 're not even giving me the benefit of the doubt . HELLO DO I LOOK LIKE SUCH A SHALLOW FREAK TO YOU . I HATE PEOPLE LIKE THAT . )
"i wanna be with people who love me the way i am.
and i know plenty of people who do and they are not perfect either."
( If you think i dont treasure you then i have nothing to say . Who asked about perfection ? We 're all humans aren 't we ? )
"blame me all you want
maybe im a melodramatic fool, but its how i feel"
( Yeah melodramatic , maybe , but i dont think you 're a fool . I blame myself for holding up such a weak position in your heart that you allow rumors to get the better of us . )
"you call me childish, but i'm not.
in fact im more rational than you are."
( Rational people get their facts right first . Yes maybe i did call you childish but it was in the harmless and joking tone like "Wahlou that Siyu is damn bimbo" followed by a couple of laughs . Tsk . You really dont know me well enough . )
"if you think im playing games, im not.
its pure disappointment cos i feel hurt and betrayed"
( Hurt ? Betrayed ? Been there , felt that too . )
Senior once told me HC is a pot cauldron of rumors and gossip and backstabbing ,
i swore never to be affected by these .
You made me change my mind .
